AttitudeAdopt

Our Journey to Adopt a Child

Monday, February 15, 2010

Gaga for Lady Gaga

We've had a trip back into the past this week. First, our microwave broke. That may not sound like a big deal, but it's quite disorienting to lose a tool we use numerous times a day. I hadn't reheated food on top of the stove for probably over 20 years. Not so bad, actually.

Then, our heating went out Thursday night. They tried to fix it on Friday, but can't, and we need to get a whole new system in. We have a wood stove in the basement, that's been heating the house ok, and supplementing with some electric heaters. At least it's in the 30's outside, and not 5 degrees. Kids are always trying to make connections between things. At one point Ethan thought that the heating went out because of the microwave.

Another blast into the past was to watch some of the videotape that Karen B. took when we were meeting Ethan at the KO orphanage 3+ years ago. We hadn't watched it before now because we didn't have a VCR player (remember what they are?. Anyway, Ethan claimed not to remember any of the Kazakh, but at one point the translator asked him a question and he turned to us and he said, "I'm telling her 'I don't know'". On the video he then sang a Kazakh song, and he turned to us and said, "What am I singing?". We told him we had no idea, but it had something to do with Kazakhstan. Makes me think that he could probably relearn the language fairly fast if he ever wanted to.

It was also amazing to see how small he was! He's grown over 15 inches since then. It was also amazing seeing him baffled by the crayons -- gave me renewed appreciation of just how far he's come, and how many challenges this brave little guy has tackled so successfully in the last 3 years.

But sometimes I'm also aware of how the adoption issue will never go away. Yesterday I mailed some vitamins and clothes to the KO orphanage. When I explained that our son was from the orphanage, the postal worker behind the desk asked me in a tense way if Ethan still had family there. Why do people ask questions like that?

At least half the time when I mention we adopted an older child, I get the loaded "and how's he DOing" with a face scrunched up ready to be sympathetic to the problems. When I say "great", they almost look confused. I was glad Ethan wasn't with me at the post office, and it made me wish I hadn't brought the topic up. On the other hand, I feel like we're also ambassadors of how adoption can work well. I guess that I bring up the topic more freely when Ethan isn't with me, so he doesn't have to deal with the weirdness. But it is tiring, I have to tell you. I even get this reaction with parents who adopted younger kids -- even though a majority of the time they're the ones with the problems.

Ethan is gaga over the pop singer Lady Gaga (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady_Gaga) right now. He was first fascinated hearing her songs on the Kiss108 radio station that the bus driver plays, and then seeing her outrageous outfits just sealed the deal.
But really, he's still in madly in love with one of his married after school teachers.